Questions. The root of all curiosity. In order to keep a conversation going, you need questions! The same can be said for a relationship, or at least an interesting and thriving one, anyway. Whether you’ve newly started dating our boyfriend or girlfriend, you’re in a long term relationship, questions to ask your significant other can be great conversation starters.
Questions have so much power. They have the power to keep things interesting, the power to reinvigorate a relationship and rekindle connection during the times when things might seem stale.
While you might not necessarily start with the really thought provoking questions for your significant other as soon as you start dating, if you’re thinking about being together for a long time, you’d certainly want to make sure you’re on the same page about the big things sooner or later.
There are also plenty of light questions you can ask one another to simply get to learn new things about each other and get to know your partner on a deeper level. Either way, these questions for your partner are a great way to promote open and honest conversations on any level!
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Deeper Questions for Your Significant Other
These deep questions really allow for an opportunity to have a meaningful conversation. You might be asking yourself, how am I going to just bring this stuff up out of the blue?
You could plan a date night to have a deep conversation, but you could also just have an open conversation with your partner as this stuff comes up. It is about asking the right questions at the right time where your partner definitely doesn’t feel blindsided.
Just remember, it doesn’t necessarily have to all be orchestrated on the perfect day – just pick a question or two and ask! Don’t forget to have respect for what each person shares when answering these important questions.
15 Questions About Your Relationship
If you’re thinking about spending the rest of your life with your partner, these are some great conversation starters for the important things in your relationship.
- What was your first impression of me?
- What is the most memorable part of our first date?
- What’s your top memory from our relationship thus far?
- What should we work on the most in our relationship?
- What do you think is required to make sure a relationship lasts?
- If we were hitting a rocky point in our relationship, what would you do to help get us back on track?
- What do I do in this relationship that makes you feel loved?
- What is a deal-breaker for you in a relationship?
- What is the ideal place where you see yourself settling down?
- What would you say our top similarities are?
- What is your idea of the perfect day together?
- What is your favorite thing about me?
- Do you think you could handle a long-distance relationship, and why or why not?
- If today was the last day we would ever be together, how would you want to spend it?
- If you could use a time machine to go back to our first date, what would you do differently?
25 Questions for Your Partner, About Your Partner!
Whether you’re in a new relationship or a long-term relationship, these questions are great to bring up when spending some quality time together!
- What is your favorite childhood memory makes you the happiest?
- Who is your hero?
- Have you ever lost someone close to you?
- What are your pet peeves and things you can’t stand?
- Would you say you’re an introvert or an extrovert?
- What do you love most about yourself, and what do you wish you could change?
- How do you feel when you hear opinions of other people?
- What is the biggest risk you’ve every taken, and had it paid off?
- What causes you stress, and what do you do to decompress?
- What is of utmost sentimental value to you?
- What is one thing you could change about your past?
- When you’ve decided you can trust someone, what is it that helps you to know?
- What would you say are your bad habits?
- Who is the one person you could talk about anything with?
- What do you think happens to us when we die?
- What is the best advice you’ve ever gotten?
- What are your 3 biggest goals in life?
- What are your biggest fears, biggest goals, and biggest regrets?
- What advice would you give your younger self?
- How do you express your anger?
- Do you value religion or spirituality?
- Have you ever struggled with addiction?
- If you could invite any dinner guest, dead or alive, who would it be?
- What game show would you like to be on – and do you think you’d win?
- What are three must-haves for road trips?
10 Questions on Family
When was the last time you both talked about family? It is a good idea to think about the future before it is upon you, and there are also some interesting questions you can ask your significant other about past family experiences.
- What do you admire about your parents and their relationship?
- Are you closer with one of your parents and if so, why?
- What are your family dynamics and relationships like?
- How do you feel about traditional gender roles in your household?
- How many kids do you want to have?
- What are values that are important to you when raising children?
- If your partner was unable to have kids, would you stay with them?
- What is the funniest thing you remember from when you were a little kid?
- What’s the first thing you think of or feel when you think about your mom (or dad)?
- If you were stranded on a desert island, which family member would you want with you and why? Which one would you definitely NOT want with you and why?
10 Intimate, Sexy Questions to Ask Your Significant Other
You’ll definitely want to consider starting the evening off with some romantic dinner and wine to prepare yourself for these intimate questions! Sex can be a difficult topic to breach with your partner but these private and romantic questions but you may find that discussing these details is the best way to keep intimacy alive and well in a healthy relationship.
- What are your biggest turn ons and turn offs?
- How would you define intimacy?
- Ideally, how many times would you want to have sex in a week?
- How did you lose your virginity?
- What are your thoughts on sex toys?
- Do you have any sexual fantasies?
- Is there anything that we haven’t tried sexually that you’d like to?
- Have you ever had a threesome, and would you want to?
- What is your favorite time of day to have sex?
- What’s one random little thing that I do that turns you on?
10 Practical Questions on Finances
Many couples spend too much time worrying about finances and part of this can be attributed to not discussing your views and future. One of the first things you should do in a serious relationship is ensure you’re on the same page.
- Do you think money can buy happiness?
- Do you have savings?
- What are your retirement plans?
- What are your thoughts on a prenuptial agreement?
- Do you have good credit? Do you have any debt?
- How would you describe your spending habits?
- What is your biggest regret when it comes to money or spending?
- If you were given $1,000 right now, what would you do with it?
- How do you think money should be managed among couples? Joint accounts, separate accounts, or some combination?
- How do you determine finances if one partner doesn’t work or is unable to work?
30 Lighter Questions and Conversation Starters for Partners
So maybe the first time around giving these questions a shot with your partner, you can go light! Some of these questions are meant to be funny.
All of the questions can be a great way to keep things interesting in a long distance relationship on some of those stale phone calls we all have from time to time, or when you are communicating by text long distance.
- What is the most interesting fact you know?
- Tell me the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you?
- What word or phrase do you live by?
- What did you want to be when you were younger?
- What is the best gift you’ve ever gotten?
- Have you ever broken the law?
- What’s your favorite and least favorite things about being an adult?
- Do you prefer to travel alone or with friends?
- What countries have you visited?
- Tell me about the kind of person you were in high school.
- What are the top three things on your bucket list?
- What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done?
- What famous person was your first crush?
- Tell me about your dream vacation.
- What is your favorite time of the day and why?
- What is the strangest thing you’ve ever eaten?
- If you could travel to space for free, would you go?
- If you could have three wishes granted, what would you wish for?
- What three items would you want with you if you were stranded on a deserted island?
- Your favorites: favorite food, favorite TV show, favorite movie, favorite animal, favorite memory, favorite holiday, favorite book, favorite song, favorite place, favorite flower, card game, sports teams?
- Are there any hobbies you want to try and haven’t had a chance to?
- What is one thing you could never live without?
- How would you describe yourself using 3 words?
- What is your dream job?
- Do you like to cook?
- What would you choose as your last meal?
- What’s something that is seemingly normal, but really grosses you out or is your biggest pet peeve?
- Who was your favorite teacher and why?
- What’s your typical Starbucks order?
- What celebrity would you like to meet?
10 This or That Questions for Couples
Here are some more great ones when you’re bored with your partner; perhaps on a road trip or even a long distance relationship. The best thing about these random questions and small talk is what bigger, more interesting topics they can lead to! Some of the funnier questions are a great way to break the ice when getting to know a new partner.
Would you rather:
- Be alone or around others when you’re in a bad mood?
- Have a job or be your own boss?
- Go out or stay in on a Friday night?
- Have your dream house or dream car?
- Be the most attractive or the funniest person?
- Hug for 10 second or kiss for 5?
- Visit the mountains or beach?
- Live in the country or city?
- Give up coffee or chocolate?
- Answer funny questions or serious questions?
Next time you’re looking for a way to bond with your partner, give some of these relationship questions a shot! Even the fun questions are a great segue to more important topics, and sometimes end up being the best questions!
Remember, significant others are probably not big fans of being blind sided, so one thing to definitely remember is to select the right time to discuss the right kinds of questions.
One of the best things about these great questions is how you get to learn more little things about the person you care about.
Also remember that in an ideal world, y’all would be on the same page about everything, but we don’t have a crystal ball and can’t predict our partner’s answers. So be patient, be kind, and remember the best part is learning the little things that make your loved one tick.
At the end of the day, this is a perfect way to learn more about their life experience and not just be partners, but best friends, too. You might also find yourself having a good time trying out some of the quizzes and games in this partner book!
Amanda is a mom of 4 living a mostly crunchy lifestyle outside of Atlanta, GA with her husband, 2 dogs, and a cat. As a former special education teacher who also has her personal training certification — Amanda really enjoys teaching others how to do things!
When she’s not working, Amanda enjoys DIY projects, exercising, photography, hiking, and long walks through Target.